Redefining Success: Crafting Your Own Narrative
Success isn't just a paycheck or a title; true success fills your life with meaning. The most perilous trap isn't failing to achieve society's idea of success but achieving it and realizing you've wasted years chasing something that never mattered to you. Interestingly enough, the happiest people aren't necessarily the ones with the most impressive resumes or the biggest bank accounts. They are the ones who take the time to define success on their own terms, not those of society.
When I got laid off, it wasn't the act of being laid off that bothered me—I've experienced that before. What truly unsettled me was the realization that the job was never meant to be forever. I wanted to return to podcasting, lean into my life experiences, and share the lessons I've learned. I'm certain that I am not the only person having these realizations, especially as I navigate uncharted territory not experienced by those older than me.
Generational Differences and Personal Experiences
I look at how my parents had a full-blown family in their twenties, unlike many millennials today. Their lives were different, filled with responsibilities that demanded immediate stability. In contrast, my generation is faced with rapid technological changes and societal shifts that foster career and personal exploration. We prioritize different values and are less willing to tolerate toxic environments, partly because we aren't burdened by the same family responsibilities they were.
Society's definition of success is crafted to keep us in pursuit of things that don't truly satisfy us. To genuinely feel fulfilled, we must rewrite our own standards of success from scratch. I've had the fancy title and paycheck, yet often felt as though I was living someone else's vision of achievement. We've been conditioned to believe that certain milestones—like acquiring a degree, a full-time job, a house, and starting a family—would equal satisfaction and success. But that's not the case. Our lives should not be governed by the ideals of those who don't even know we exist.
Navigating Changes with Confidence
Success changes with different life seasons. What worked in your twenties might suffocate you in later years. For example, my relationship with social activities has shifted; I still enjoy a good cocktail but no longer feel the need to party non-stop. Our bodies and lives evolve, demanding that we adapt.
Monetizing Passions: To Do or Not To Do?
A critical truth is that not every passion needs to be monetized. This realization was significant for me, as I come from a background where every idea was viewed as a potential money-making opportunity. I was good at many things, thanks possibly to undiagnosed ADHD, but quickly lost interest if something wasn't continuously challenging or creative. Not every hobby should become a revenue stream; some joys should remain untouched by professional obligation.
I like to apply the 90/10 rule—spend 90% of your work time on competence and 10% on things that light you up. This balance helps to avoid turning passions into burdens.
The Value of Money in Life's Equation
Money is a tool, not a worth indicator. It supports the life you want but shouldn't define your values. The number that matters isn't your salary but how many moments feel meaningful each day. Many in my age group now feel empowered to redefine success for themselves, embracing the mindset that success evolves with life's seasons.
Creating a Soft Landing for Career Transitions
Shifting careers is no small feat, and I've broken it down into three steps suitable for anyone considering a pivot:
Define Personal Success: Get detailed about what success truly means to you, separate from society's expectations.
Test Small Changes: Make small adjustments before diving into a complete transformation to gauge what works for you.
Build a Bridge Plan: Establish both financial and emotional safety nets. When I took a year off to focus on my podcast, I initially failed to plan for the emotional challenges, which took a toll. It's crucial to prepare for both the resources you need and the emotional support necessary during transitions.
Consider how often you've redefined "making it." Remember when success was as simple as getting your driver's license or your first job? Strip away societal expectations, and ask yourself what you would pursue if money weren't a factor.
Writing Your Own Definition of Success
I challenge you to redefine success for yourself. Share your version with me on Instagram or LinkedIn at Healing In Hindsight, because if we all wrote our own success narratives, we could appreciate life more deeply. Your milestones, defined by your own terms, will feel profoundly rewarding.
In life's race, no one else's measuring stick matters if it doesn't bring you peace. So, go ahead—write a new definition of success and live by it. Let your journey be as unique as you are.
